connorkawaii: connorkawaii: the sims 4 logo looks like something i made on powerpoint with the gradient filter in primary school wow i swear to god i thought i’d have a go and actual logo: powerpoint: your secrets out EA
doses-and-mimosas: hm I can’t ever decide if I actually wanna date someone or if I just wanna date the idea of them
liarnjamespayne: in 5th grade they made my class do a seminar thing on drugs and we had to sign an anti-drug pledge and afterwards they gave us these really fancy certificates declaring that we would be drug free forever and i ended up rolling a joint with mine in freshman year so there u go
Dentist: *stabs you in your chest*
Dentist: You're bleeding because you don't floss.
fallarcy: I really need to burn some calories with you in my bed
westbor0baptistchurch: tootsied: iapprovethispost: tootsied: I don’t give a damn about my reputation [LOUD GUITAR] You’re living in the past it’s a new generation [LOUD GUITAR] [SHREK ATTACKS THE KNIGHTS AT LORD FARQUAD’S CASTLE]
sadillite: all i do is sit around and eat and be sad im basically a more annoying version of a plant
Am I the only one excited for the new Vampire Weekend album or ?
Don't care who you are, it always sucks when you...
That just happened
me in 1st grade: wow swearing is so bad i won't ever swear
me now: pass the motherfuckin salt you fuck
akane-tamru: lampsarepeopletoo: Quoting spongebob is the fastest way to my heart WHAT?! WHAT DID HE SAY?
ghostam: How relationships work: I like your butt. However, I can notice other butts. They can be nice too. But your butt is my favourite butt. It’s the nicest butt. Because it’s mine. And I can touch it.
maduhhlyn: woah bummer for everyone not making out with me right now
hepatitisbey: I don’t want to learn in a classroom anymore. I want to travel and talk to people and learn that way. I want to learn as I go, gathering knowledge and not being rigorously tested on it. I don’t want to lose passion in the things I like because of the worry of exams. I want to fuelled by snippets of knowledge I gain from people and be inquisitive. School has stolen my passion for...
what she says: im fine
what she means: im doug dimmadome, owner of the dimmsdale dimmadome
sapphirebones: jaacknasty: Probably the best 6 seconds ever. i fucking lost it
oohtheyhavenibbles: I JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT GLOSTER CANARIES AND I’M GONNA CRY LOOKIT THEM THEY HAVE BOWLCUTS BOWLCUTS LOOK AT THAT SMUG LITTLE FUCKER WITH HIS FUCKING BOWLCUT
hotlocalsingle: DONT SIT ON TOP THIS DICK IF U SCARED OF HEIGHTS
passion: shall i compare thee to a summer’s day? hot as balls
banmat: jerkidiot: in Danish, we don’t say “I love you” we say “hendes fisse skaldet ligesom calliou” which means “you are part of me” and i think that’s really beautiful